Quickly: we’ll be dark today as well as Monday. See you Tuesday, when I’ll probably be incredibly sunburned. Be careful with fireworks this weekend, and I just want everyone to know I love America. WHOO!
Just like everyone else who isn’t dead inside, I really enjoy end zone celebrations. It’s hilarious to observe sportswriters and commentators get angry when Randy Moss faux-moons the crowd or Chad Johnson performs CPR on a football. I’m guessing that everyone will have the same reaction to this one, though: confusion.
Last night, Toronto Argos receiver Arland Bruce ran in for a touchdown. Then he ripped off his helmet, jersey, and shoulder pads, laid down in the endzone, closed his eyes, and crossed his arms. This is the strange part:
Bruce said he was honoring the memory of Michael Jackson by pretending to be buried.
Is … what is this? Is this irony? If a player wants to do an end zone celebration that pays tribute to Michael Jackson, the obvious solution is to Moonwalk. Can’t Moonwalk? It’s hard, don’t feel bad. Just do the Thriller dance or something. He gave you plenty of fodder when he was alive; there’s no need to impersonate his corpse. As if someone watching on television would wistfully take a sip of beer and think, “Yep … that was Michael Jackson for you. Always bein’ buried.”
Furthermore, I’m not sure why he thought his “dead Michael Jackson” impression would be any more authentic without half his uniform. “No, guys, you don’t get it! Michael Jackson would never be buried while wearing a jersey and football helmet! He didn’t even play football!”
Of course, this isn’t weird because it’s macabre or disrespectful or anything like that. This is weird because it doesn’t make a damn bit of sense. Look for him to pay a special end zone tribute to Farrah Fawcett next week by … I don’t know, drinking a glass of water?
In my apparently ongoing responsibilities as MPSB’s resident soccer beat blogger — I would have written beat “reporter,” but come on, me? report? ha! — I’ve noticed a trend: more people are caring about soccer. At the very least, people are more frequently crawling out of their holes to hate on soccer, which is as good an indication as any that the sport is trending upward. (Celizic strikes again, by the way. You know it’s bad when Mike Decourcy, probably the most polite writer of all-time, personally calls you out.)
Anyway, if soccer does become more popular, a lot of that popularity will have to do with ESPN czar John Skipper’s programming decisions. If ESPN gives soccer the same treatment as the NFL — especially during the World Cup in 2010 — you can bet on a sudden, if not prolonged, spike in popularity.
Fortunately for people strangely obsessed with the idea of soccer becoming popular in America, it seems that’s exactly what ESPN is going to do. The network will be doing round the clock World Cup coverage next summer. That includes 32 soft-focus personal interest features on a player from each of the tournament’s 32 teams. It also includes Chris Berman doing SportsCenter live from South Africa. Beyond being, as Spencer Hall points out, prime Chris Berman-lion-attack territory — now THAT would make soccer popular — this presents an essential conundrum: Will ESPN somehow overexpose soccer before most people even know what soccer is? I say yes! And then we’ll be right back where we started, which is actually just fine with me, thanks.
Andy Murray is as recognizable a British athlete as there is. But you don’t need me to tell you that. Rick Reilly, ESPN columnist and cheesy video essayist extraordinaire can handle that task, as he does above. Yes, Reilly is examining the Brits’ newfound love affair with Murray, whose deep run into Wimbledon is the sort of thing British people get really excited about. Remember Tim Henman? He was actually pretty good in Virtua Tennis on Dreamcast; he was also the subject of yearly British exuberance, and ultimately disappointment, whenever Wimbledon rolled around.
Anyway, the point of Reilly’s little video is that Andy Murray is popular in England. Which is why it would make sense to score the piece with “God Save The Queen.” Except the producer didn’t do that. He or she, for whatever reason — and I admit it’s hard to notice at first — chose the German national anthem, “Das Deutschlandlied.” Minor mistake! Fortunately, England and Germany share no sense of ill will toward one another bred by any sort of recent historical conflict; heck, they don’t mind the occasional anthem swap! Hey, sure! Go for it!
Is this your homework, Scotty? Is this your homework, Scotty?
While baseball super-agent Scott Boras was eating at a restaurant on Monday evening, someone was in the parking lot smashing up his Land Rover.
The agent told police that his car was parked in the lot at 3201 East Coast Highway between 9:15 and 10:10 p.m. Monday when someone used an unknown hard, long object (baseball bat maybe?) to strike the front and driver’s side window.
Crimes like these often go unsolved, so I’ve taken it upon myself to write up a list of possible suspects. Who would want to smash up Scott Boras’ car?
- The Venn diagram overlap of a) fans bitter that Boras coaxed their favorite player away from their favorite team, and b) people who intensely dislike Land Rovers
- Guy who would have settled for Photoshopping Boras as Satan or the Emperor from Star Wars, if only he knew how to use Photoshop
- Blind baseball player innocently taking warm-up swings; wrong place, wrong time
- Karma, which would have orchestrated an elaborate chain of events that would give Boras his comeuppance and teach him a valuable life lesson, but was feeling really lazy that day
- Sports bloggers who really, really wanted an excuse to make a Big Lebowski reference. Just saying.
Lost Time Is Not Found Again is what the MPS blog crew has been reading today. Maybe.
+ Reporter mistakes blog named after Charles Barkley for an actual Charles Barkley blog. {Sir Charles In Charge.}
+ Sweet Ken Griffey Jr. tee. {Big League Stew.}
+ Ricky Rubio in a Gillette commerical. {Canis Hoopus.}
+ This bro really likes LeBron James. {Hoop Doctors.}
+ Non-sports: Facebook tries to out do Twitter. {PC World.} Beatle experts discuss how Michael Jackson’s death parallels when Lennon, Elvis died. {Examiner.}
Quotable:
“Translation: If you’re not with the BCS, you’re against the BCS. Sadly, there is little evidence that arguing for a playoff is a weapon of mass destruction pointed directly at the BCS, which in itself is a kind of fetal playoff early in its gestation. The possibility of bringing ‘88 back and going pure bowl system does not exist because people don’t tend to like to turn off faucets that spout cash, and that is precisely what the BCS has been and could continue to be for quite a while. Money in hand tends to stay money in hand, and therefore the BCS ain’t going anywhere as long as people like watching football on television.
As problematic as this is for someone who sees the flaws in the system, I can’t help but stick up for the system in one respect: the BCS, while not a championship system (i.e. a playoff,) does attempt to create a compelling matchup to end the season that more often than not crowns something like a winner. (Watch your step or you’ll trip over all those qualifiers.) The old bowl system makes no such effort, and is pure exhibition from which sportswriters and other assorted poll voters extracted their pick for the finest team in the land that year. This sometimes went very, very poorly, and if you care to talk about how poorly it could go, you can ask 1994 Penn State about the virtues of the old bowl-only system.” – Spencer Hall
And he and his agent are voicing all their displeasure on Twitter, of course! You see, as Eamonn wrote yesterday, the Hawks were toeing the line between re-signing Martin Havlat or going balls out and picking up back-to-back All-Star Marian Hossa from Detroit.
The Hawks went in the latter direction, signed Hossa to a 12-year deal, and Havlat was left out in the cold. He signed with the Wild yesterday instead — a deal worth $30 million over six years. The Minnesota fans showed him love, so he dropped this on his Twitter.
Excited to be in Minny where I was welcomed and appreciated by management. The real story about what happened in Chicago to come out.
The real story? Do tell.
There’s something to be said for loyalty and honor.
Have we entered into a Lord of the Rings novel?
Havlat’s agent, Allan Walsh, seems to have told that real story on Twitter:
Havlat received multi year offers from several teams…except Chicago. After 3 months of negotiating a long term contract, Chicago would …
After 3 months of negotiating a long term contract, Chicago would not offer anything more than a 1 year deal. So much for taking care of the team MVP
So yeah, according to Havlat’s agent, the Hawks were negotiating a longer-term deal with his client all along, but when actual free agency hit, the Hawks retreated, and put a hard sale on for Hossa. I suppose you can’t blame Havlat or his agent for their reactions.
Sports are a business, sure, and athletes have to keep that in mind. But when you expect one thing from a club you’ve worked hard for, and all of a sudden you’re swept under the rug, it’s never a good feeling.
Searching high and low, and then around the back, here’s what some of the Web’s finest basketball writers have to say about Ben Gordon signing with Detroit last evening.
Also worth noting: you can make the argument that both Gordon and the Bulls were losers in the negotiations. The Bulls lose because one of their best players is going to their biggest rival in the prime of his career for zero compensation. In Interweb speak, we like to refer to that as FAIL. Gordon doesn’t get off clean either, though. The contract he took from Detroit is pretty similar to the one he rejected two years ago from the Bulls. Now he’s 26, back then he was 24. Had he taken the Bulls’ first offer way back when, he’d still be young enough to cash in on another phat contract. By the time his deal with the Pistons expires, he’ll be 31 and out of his prime. Also, Gordon is leaving Chicago (which is a great city) for Detroit (which is a miserable city).
In basketball terms, Gordon’s departure means John Salmons and Luol Deng need to step up. Last we saw them, Salmons was awesome, and Deng was bad and hurt. Is that what we can expect again?
Honestly? I’m bummed. Despite his flaws as a player — undersized, one-dimensional, a little shot-happy — Gordon, more than anyone else, was the team’s one true constant over the past four or five seasons. He missed only 12 games in five seasons. He never shot under 40 percent from three-point range (and only during his rookie campaign did he hit less than 41 percent). He led the Bulls in scoring the past four seasons. He never quit or gave up on the team, even after contract negotiations broke down the last two summers. No, he couldn’t defend bigger guards (which was pretty much everybody), but during his time in Chicago he was an exemplary player and person. (Well, exept for that time he cussed out Vinny Del Negro.)
But you know what’s odd about Ben’s career in the Windy City? He was a proven 20-point scorer and one of the league’s premier long-range snipers, and yet management never treated him like anything more than a complimentary piece…and not a make-or-break piece at that. Sure, they offered him $50 million-plus the last two summers, but they were never willing to grant him The Man status. Heck, it was never even a sure thing he’d be a starter.
Well that was quick. Ben Gordon became a free agent at midnight yesterday. He met with Joe Dumars and the Pistons yesterday. He agreed to a five-year $55 million deal yesterday. That was about that. After contract extensions broke down the last two summers between Gordon and the Bulls, he wasted no time moving on to another team as soon as he could. It looks like the Bulls didn’t think Gordon was worth that much, and thought Kirk Hinrich is of more value going forward in the backcourt.
Our Mitch Robinson caught up with BG last night after the Pistons deal was announced:
“It was an easy decision. I went to visit and speaking with (Pistons GM) Joe Dumars I liked everything he had to say, I like everything the organization stands for … they’re all about winning and I want that too,” Gordon stated over the phone. “Joe exudes that (winning) he eats, sleeps and breathes basketball and that’s an organization I need to be a part of.”
Ben’s tenure in Chicago lasted five seasons, and he averaged 20.7 points last year. It’s going to be hard to replace his scoring — the Bulls certainly didn’t draft it — but that’s about all they should concern themselves with. Perhaps John Salmons can prove last season wasn’t a fluke?
Gordon’s not known as a particularly good defender, and it was rare he tallied many boards or assists. He’s a one-dimensional player, but he’s a good one at that. When he’s on, he’s on.
Best of luck, Ben. Just make sure not to hit any of your daggers against the Bulls, huh?
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