Mike Ditka is definitely on the short list of “aging sports people I want to see given unfiltered Internet writing privileges.” Well, wish granted.

I stumbled upon this little goldmine while “researching”  — via  ESPN the Mag and Extra P — the Gridiron Greats charity, and there’s a recent five blog posts from a celebrity golf tournament that includes entries from Michael Irvin and this bit of poetry from Dit-ka.

Well here we are at Lost Dunes Golf Course folks.

It is BEAUTIFUL weather. It is a great day.

I gave my speech, we took a picture. But my game is not on top of the world.

Inches away from the hole, and I three putted. F*** this game!!!!

I just can’t wait to hit the clubhouse after my round!!! UGH!!!

What a man of the people. I totally said the same thing on Sunday night. And speaking of helping the little guy out, Ditka and the rest of the Gridiron Greats board are played golf last weekend in an effort to raise money, which they do primarily, if I understand this right, by auctioning off their collective memorabilia.

The proceeds go to benefit retired NFL players dealing with injuries and the medical bills/debt that accumulate with those (a subject for which the joking of is best left to others more enriched with such, um, talents) post-football career hardships.

Of course, that’s not all they did to help out their retired brethren.

Fund director Jennifer Smith says the best is yet to come, starting with a massive fundraising extravaganza set to kick off in Chicago on August 23rd and running through the weekend. High rollers can bid to play golf or blackjack with the likes of Michael Irvin, Deacon Jones and Merlin Olson, just a few of the 40 Hall of Famers scheduled to attend. The online auction is currently taking high-dollar bids on a private dinner with Ditka.

F*** that dinner. How about 18 instead?