Another reason it’s good to be a Bears fan: When you win a game, your owner doesn’t feel it necessary to come to the locker room and act like an over-’roided high school team captain. But then I guess Virginia Halas McCaskey might have a bit of problem with that sort of thing.

In high school, I played football for a couple of years, and the locker room was always the most entertaining thing. Not entertaining in a homoerotic way, though there was that dynamic. It was mostly entertaining because no matter how much we were winning by, if you were talking in the locker room at halftime the captains would come in and scream “SHUT UP!! SHUT UP!!” as loud as possible for like five minutes. If you didn’t shut up, they got even louder. It was hilarious.

I saw a couple of those guys at home this weekend. They’re still way cooler than Dan Snyder.