Of course it was only a game, and of course it was merely a one-stop thing, and of course there is another game tonight, and Carlos Zambrano’s pitching, and it’s a five-game series, and it’s important to remain calm and oh forget it: I’m going to freak out. Sorry. I just am.

I’m not going to go on and on about this, but after last night — after impatient at-bats and ground balls and walk after walk by Ryan Dempster — I can’t help but feeling like this Cubs team is going to be found out. Revealed. An imposter. The jig: up.

I mean, think about it: Ryan f–king Dempster? The guy who couldn’t even stick in the rotation last year? This is our Game 1 starter? How did I learn to trust this man? Really? Alfonso Soriano, for all of his talents, is not a leadoff hitter, no matter what he might think. Kosuke Fukudome, who at least made good contact last night, is not the patient see-everything technician he is supposed to be. Derrek Lee can’t help but ground into double plays. Geovany Soto sees one runner on second and thinks he needs to go yard. Sean Marshall … ugh. Must I go on?

Oh, the fragile psyche of Cubs fans. Whatever. Guilty. I’m not going to be all Paul Newman-strong-silent-type today, or tomorrow, or this weekend. I’m freaked out. There. I said it.