A day or two ago, I heard that Brian Wilson, San Fransisco Giants closer, was using Twitter. Not all famous athletes deserve to be followed on Twitter. Many are boring or just weird. But Wilson is my roto closer, so I gave him the old follow. Maybe he’ll tweet about when I should drop him, or when his arm is feeling a little rough, or when … OK I’ll stop talking about my fantasy baseball team now.

The first dispatch I got was Wilson explaining that he was eating cheeseburgers, and that people need to stop taking things so seriously. Then … silence. What happened?

Turns out, Wilson wrote a tweet that said “Scottsdale is fun but overaggressive males are not,” leading people to think Wilson was out in Arizona getting roughed up the night before a game. Wilson responded to those inferences by saying he was eating room service hamburgers. This makes no sense.

Now, Wilson has deleted all of his tweets prior to Sunday morning. His explanation? People just can’t handle his prose bombs:

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