Anyone watching football yesterday knows two obvious things: 1) Terrell Owens improves the Bills passing attack. 2) Tony Romo is less effective without Owens.

Now, the second part wasn’t immediately obvious after Week 1 because Romo looked awesome against a hapless Bucs team (admittedly, yes, the same hapless Bucs team that Owens and Lee Evans scored against), but it was obvious yesterday on Sunday Night Football as Romo laid an egg against the Giants during the opening for the Cowboys’ new stadium.

Naturally, TO had something to say about the whole affair. Well, kind of — I’m assuming that a “retweet” does count as “saying something” right? (Because it should.)

RT @mcgowanboi: @terrellowens Dallas just found out they had a T.R. problem not a T.O problem !!

TO let that hang out there for a few hours before offering up a fake-sounding, albeit apologetic, tweet of his own:

Look, I’m nt gonna say anything bad about the cowboys, I hate tht sum of my boys played hard & they lost! Hope my boy MB is ok!! Nite!

OK, let’s just move on from the whole “Romo v. Owens” thing, as well as the Cowboys issues with their QB  — these are obvious; we don’t need to discuss them — and focus on whether a retweet counts as Owens actually saying something, because I tend to think that’s the issue at stake here, right? (For those Twitter illiterate: A retweet essentially means you are re-broadcasting what someone else already said on the service. In this case, @mcgowanboi said that line to TO, and then TO retweeted it for all his followers to see.)

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Last week, the Lincoln Journal Star highlighted another absurd price at Cowboys Stadium (a thread we’ve talked about here before): a plain pizza in luxury boxes? That will cost you NINETY DOLLARS.

But looks like this was wrong, as it’s believed a tour guide gave out some bad info.  (And if we can’t trust a tour guide … who can we trust? )

Todd Archer is here to set the world straight:

Now, people in suites can get a $60 pizza. It’s 20 inches. There are cheese, pepperoni, chicken and artichoke, meat and margherita options. Toppings included. And it’s the same price they had last year at Texas Stadium.

Oh, OK, so it’s only sixty dollars. And it’s what they charged last year? Totally cool. Think about it: you can get toppings now — mmm, artichokes! — and it’s $30 less than we previously thought.

I think this is what people in the retail business call a “deal.”

I don’t know about you guys, but if I’m ever in Cowboys Stadium, I’m going to try and finesse my way into a suite for one of these guys.

Also see: TSB/SOB

The NFL always releases the “Fantasy Files” commercials around this time, with various NFL’ers doing cr-cr-craaaaazy things on the football field. They are quite awesome. But not as awesome as the following video, featuring Chris and Tanner Cooley Colt Brennan playing the roles of Jason Witten and Tony Romo in a mock-up of a Fantasy Files commercial. Watch, enjoy and then we’ll discuss.

OK, so here’s the thing: this appears to be unprovoked, right? I mean, Witten and Romo are easy targets and it is Redskins-Cowboys, but still, totally unprovoked if I recall correctly.

Which is exactly what makes this so awesome — Cooley wants to ramp up the rivalry, but instead of just dogging Romo’s inability to lock up Jessica Simpson or hold onto the ball late in games, he simply ruled on the two Cowboys players for being rednecks and jealous of not having a fantasy files commercial. And he did it in a really, really, really funny way. Oh yeah, and he also created the hysterically awesome “J-Wit” nickname (although I think “J-Wizzle” would have been better). Just another +1000 Internet day in the life of Chris Cooley, really.

It’s difficult for me to believe this story, but it amuses me all the same. On the Micheal Irvin Show yesterday, former Cowboys defensive linebacker Greg Ellis was complaining about his “diminished role” on the team last season, and eventually — get ready — told the tale of The Most Selfless Hide-And-Seek Game Ever.

“It’s a disgrace when DeMarcus Ware comes off the field just so I can get in the game and when the coaches tell him to come on the field, he tries to hide so I can play,” Ellis said on Irvin’s show.

Whoa, dude. I like to think I have my share of impressive hide-and-seek stories (one time I removed the contents of a refrigerator, took out the shelves, and hid in it), but I concede the prize to you.

All right, full disclosure. I didn’t hide in the fridge; that was actually the kid down the street who could burp the alphabet. And I suspect that Ellis’ story doesn’t have a lot of merit either. Both Ellis and Ware started all 16 games from the Cowboys last season. From the Dallas Morning News:

Ware rarely sat out a defensive snap with the exception of late in the Thanksgiving win over the Seahawks, when he suffered a knee injury.

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Life is never fair. You work hard, you do your best, and then you come home from the most miserable post office experience of your life — my paychecks from the last two weeks are definitely in the mail somewhere, it’s just that they don’t know where, exactly, which is helpful — and you read a blog post like this. And then death-by-alcohol becomes a suddenly viable option:

The 72 x 160-foot LED wall at the center of the new Cowboys Stadium is certainly impressive enough when it’s showing game highlights or concert footage, but no giant screen ever truly earns its credentials until it’s been put to some real use: playing video games. Thankfully, Jonas Brothers video director Steve Fatone somehow pulled himself away from concert preparations to do just that earlier this week, and apparently became the first person to ever play Xbox 360 on the display in the process.

Yes, the first person to play video games on the most awesomest screen of all time wasn’t that screen’s owner, Jerry Jones, or someone more qualified, like Steve Wiebe. Nope. It was the dude who directs videos for the Jonas Brothers. This is what a life of disguising sex as virtue and selling it to teenage girls apparently gets you. Like I said: not fair.

One of my favorite blog posts we’ve ever done here was highlighting the $9 Pabst Blue Ribbon at new Yankee Stadium. Nine dollars! For a PBR! Hipsters everywhere cried tears of sadness.

But, the Cowboys’ new stadium is giving the Yankees a literal run for their money. Followers of Martellus Bennett’s Twitter feed might have seen him pimping a tour of the team’s new stadium, and the video that followed.

The fine people at Intentional Foul grabbed this from said video:

Unless the Cowboys are still working out the details of food and drink prices, you are indeed reading that right: $14 for a beef sandwich and $7.50 for a hot dog. Tremendous.

Though, maybe it’s not so bad.There’s a chance each of these items is the size of my head, right?

DeMarcus Ware, or at least someone pretending to be the Cowboys defensive stud, tweeted recently that he and the ‘Boys were “getting close” on a contract extension.

Turns out that, um, this is awkwardly fake news. See, Ware’s account is not Ware at all. And likely just some Internet prankster person. In all likelihood, a pantsless blogger hellbent on bringing down society one tweet at a time.

The real DeMarcus Ware informed Todd Archer via text message that the person posing as him on Twitter is an imposter.

So today’s posts about Ware and the Cowboys “getting close” on contract negotiations mean nothing.

OK, so this isn’t good. I mean, whenever someone impersonates another person, it’s never a good thing. That’s called identity theft. But this is also why people always think long and hard about actually verifying athletes on Twitter before they start to follow them and believe every word they say to be the gospel of what’s going on in the sports world.

Of course, this will probably be made out to be far worse than it actually is: such is the case with new media and bloggers all over the land. (Note that here, “bloggers” means “any social trend that old people don’t understand but associate with blogs because they’re the newest and most scariest of all things that the Internet has created and therefore must receive backlash.”)

But for now, just avoid following any famous athlete on Twitter that you don’t know is for real. Otherwise, you might get tricked into thinking something that’s not true.