Preface: This topic is kind of played out, but whatever. It’s pretty fascinating to me. Also, this is sort of long. But if you find this topic fascinating as well, come along for the ride.

I’m usually not one to get into the “Who’s the greatest of all-time?” debates, namely because that discussion is a bit frivolous, and seems more apt for a “1st and Ten” or “Around the Horn” screamfest.

Babe Ruth is the benchmark in baseball, but it’s sort of difficult to compare him to modern stars, especially modern stars using performance-enhancing drugs. There’s a whole host of other guys you could argue for: Willie Mays, Barry Bonds etc., but there is no definitive answer there*.

*Baseball Prospectus does try and normalize players from long ago with today’s players using peers, adjustments for different ballparks and the like, but the fact still remains: There’s no hands-down No. 1 player.

Same goes for football: There’s just too many wide-ranging positions. How does one compare a guard to a quarterback, a running back to a linebacker? We can debate the best players at a certain position, but the GOAT in football across the board is always going to be difficult to ascertain. And even at each position, there’s debate.

But basketball is sort of a different breed. Michael Jordan is the greatest player of all-time. You will find very little resistance or debate in this one. Not only does he have the statistics so far to back this, but he has the championships to back this up as well. And, unlike football, basketball players are much easier to stack up against each other. Though a center or power forward plays a different role than a guard and they’re often excluded from a GOAT debate and put in their own separate category, it’s nowhere near as all over the place as football. When you think the best ever in basketball, you think Michael Jordan. When you think the best ever in football or baseball, we don’t have such a clear answer. This is why, if I’m going to gravitate to any of these debates, basketball is the one I’ll choose. It’s more simple, clear cut and it involves Michael Jordan. I like Michael Jordan. A lot.

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Well, um, this may not be the best timing for this guy, considering that whole Carlos Zambrano not allowing a hit business last night against the Astros. But there was a goat suspiciously hanging around Chicago at the end of last week, and our cameras just happened to catch it all. (Because as we all know, that’s totally the reason the Cubs haven’t won the World Series in 100 years: the curse of the Billy Goat. Nothing to do with the on-field performance, of course.)

I’m surprised how well this goat knew the city; perhaps I’ll hire her as a tour guide next time she comes around.