Ever wonder how many games the Chicago Blackhawks have won this season when playing Central Division teams? How ‘bout their success rate when their opponent had a game the night before? Even better, ever wonder how many games the Hawks have won this season when the Ice Girls wear skirts instead of pants?
 
There’s a place to find all of these stats and more.
 
The Committed Indian, a Blackhawks-themed newsletter sold outside the United Center before home games, dubs itself “The Real Fan’s Program.” Like The Blue Line, a similar paper that stopped production a few years ago, The Indian is the work of a die-hard Hawks follower who brings a fan’s perspective and voice to the business of cheering for the Blackhawks.
 
Articles and cartoons—both humorous and legit—are teamed with false advertisements like one for “Burish Collision Insurance: I never learned to stop, why should you?” Opponent scouting reports are nestled next to in-depth stats about the Hawks (including completely ridiculous ones, like the team’s record when the United Center PA plays a PJ Harvey song).
 
Just like Mouthpiece Sports, The Indian aims to dish out the inside scoop without media bias or a sense of detachment from the everyday fan. When the mainstream media is feeding you the same old sound bites and clichés, it’s refreshing to read pieces like “Top Ten Reasons Girl Hawks Fans Are Hotter Than Girl Bulls Fans” and “That Last Step Is A Bertuzzi.”
 
The Indian is worth picking up, whether you remember the glory of the Hull-Mikita days or you just jumped on the Hawks bandwagon this year. At the very least, you can count on someone else to calculate the Hawks’ record in Monday night games (1-1-1), when Brent Sopel looks six steps slow (3-4-3) or when the “shoot the puck bimbo” scores (2-0-1).
 
You won’t get all the Blackhawks info you need, but you’ll sure get a whole lot you don’t need. And that’s just the kind of stuff die-hard fans can’t live without.
 
 (You can pick up The Committed Indian outside the United Center before every home game or email committedindian@gmail.com to get an online subscription).